Yosemite Adventure Starts Here: Your Merced Gateway Hotel!
Yosemite Adventure Starts Here: Your Merced Gateway Hotel! - A Messy, Honest, and Slightly Over-Caffeinated Review
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because I just got back from a pre-Yosemite adventure pit stop at "Yosemite Adventure Starts Here: Your Merced Gateway Hotel!" (that's a mouthful, isn't it?). I'm still buzzing from the drive, the anticipation of those giant sequoias, and, well, maybe a little too much hotel coffee. So, let's dive into this chaotic, caffeine-fueled review, alright?
Overall Vibe (and My First Impression - Yikes)
First off, the name is a teensy bit…optimistic. "Adventure Starts Here"? More like, "Adventure Prep Stops Here, Because You Need a Bed After 5 Hours in the Car." Don't expect the hotel to be some thrilling prelude to Yosemite's grandeur – it's more of a solid, functional starting point. My first thought was, "Okay, this is a hotel. It exists." Then my second thought, walking into the lobby with my luggage (it felt like I was carrying a whole weekend worth of stuff - including a kayak, which didn't make sense at the time, but hey, maybe I'd feel like paddling something), was, "Alright, this place looks clean." And clean is a huge win, especially these days, so thumbs up for that. The lobby was your standard, neutral-colored, hotel lobby, with some brochures…and what looked like a particularly tired-looking stuffed bear wearing a Yosemite t-shirt. Bless his heart.
Cleanliness and Safety: A Sigh of Relief!
Speaking of clean! The hotel REALLY emphasized safety precautions, which was a huge relief. They've clearly been prepping for the pandemic. I mean, the "professional-grade sanitizing services" they boast about? I saw them in action. Like, the staff was constantly cleaning. I felt like I'd wandered onto a science lab (in a good way!). They use anti-viral cleaning products, which is reassuring. Hand sanitizer stations were everywhere (a total win), and the staff was masked up and generally vigilant. They even removed the shared stationery (good riddance to those germ-infested pens!).
Room Review: My Fortress of Slumber (Mostly)
Now, the room itself. Let's get real: no, it wasn't the Ritz. But it was clean, comfy, and a definite improvement over the "I-didn't-sleep-in-a-hotel-last-night" vibe I was going for. Crucially, it was non-smoking (thank you, hotel gods!). The air conditioning worked (another bonus, especially in the California heat) – the blackout curtains were a lifesaver (because let's face it, sunshine is for after I have had my coffee). I appreciated the extra long bed (I'm tall), a refrigerator to keep my water and coffee cold, and the free Wi-fi – because, hello, Instagram!
The Wi-Fi – A Love-Hate Relationship
Speaking of Wi-Fi…They claim to have "Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!" And technically, that's true. But it was…spotty. Let's just say there were times when I was yelling at my laptop. "Come on, Wi-Fi, BE there for me!" "Internet access – wireless," Yes, it's there, but it's more of a suggestion than a guarantee. And the Internet [LAN]? Forget about it. I’m not sure anyone even uses LAN anymore. It's like finding a fax machine in 2023.
Dining, Glorious Dining (and My Coffee Obsession)
Okay, the food. This is where things got interesting. They offer "Breakfast [buffet],” but I'm not talking about your typical continental breakfast, as in "Toast and stale donuts" - I tried the Asian breakfast, and it was a delicious adventure, especially the miso soup… I was even able to try the Western breakfast - the pancakes actually tasted like pancakes and not cardboard! There's a coffee shop! (thank heavens for all the caffeine). The restaurants offered a wide variety, from "A la carte" to "international cuisine". There was even a vegetarian restaurant…I was really impressed by the food here.
Things to Do (Besides Sleep and Eat - Though Those Are Pretty Good) - Where's the Pool?
There’s a fitness center, which I intended to use…but, you know, Yosemite was calling. There's a pool (outdoor!), which was lovely, though not the most scenic. I guess, it was a pool with a view! Definitely refreshing after a long drive. There's also a spa/sauna, which I'd skipped. I was far too lazy to try the sauna and the steam room.
Accessibility: Not Fully Investigated, But Seemed Okay
I didn't need any special accessibility features, but I did notice they do have "facilities for disabled guests". The elevators seemed easy to use. I did not see an "on-site accessible restaurant/lounge", but the lobby was accessible.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things that Help
Okay, the little things that earned this hotel some serious bonus points. The "24-hour front desk" was a huge plus. The daily housekeeping was efficient. I'm a sucker for a concierge service. I could have gotten a car park. They offer "cashless payment service" which is super convenient! All of these features made my stay very comfortable.
The Quirks and the "Meh": My Emotional Rollercoaster
- The "Oh-so-helpful" check-in. It was quick and easy. They got me in and out. I would have liked more personalized instructions--I'm sure they were very busy, though.
- The Poolside Bar: I never actually went to the poolside bar. I was too busy, plotting my hikes to the sequoias.
- The Lack of a Soul: Okay, I'm being harsh. It's not a soulless hotel, but it’s not going to win any awards for charm. It's functional. That's sometimes all you need.
The Verdict: Should You Stay Here?
Look, if you're looking for a luxurious, five-star experience, this isn't the place. However, if you're looking for a clean, safe, and convenient base camp for exploring Yosemite, then "Yosemite Adventure Starts Here: Your Merced Gateway Hotel!" is a solid choice. It's a solid, no-frills place to crash after a long drive, or before a long hike. Just don't expect a five-star experience. Expect a functional experience, and you won't be disappointed. I'd stay again. But maybe I'd bring my own, better coffee. And definitely not a kayak.
Las Cruces Econo Lodge Near NM University: Unbeatable Rates!Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's travel itinerary. We're going to the Quality Inn Merced Gateway to Yosemite, because, well, Yosemite ain't exactly inside Merced. And frankly, I am already exhausted just thinking about it. Here's the plan, or lack thereof…
Day 1: Arrival and the Crushing Weight of Expectations
- 1:00 PM (ish): Arrive at Sacramento International Airport (SMF). The usual airport chaos: toddlers screaming, overpriced coffee, and the faint scent of desperation hanging in the air. My flight was delayed, of course. Because when isn't it? Made me miss my first margarita of the trip-- a travesty, I tell you.
- 1:30 PM (ish): Pick up the rental car. Pray it's not a lemon. Last time, I swear, the brakes were optional. Seriously, car rentals are a gamble every time.
- 2:30 PM - 4:00 PM (ish): The DRIVE (dubbed the "Highway to Hangry" by yours truly): Drive to Merced. Expect traffic, construction, and possibly a meltdown from yours truly. I'll probably get lost, because GPS is my mortal enemy, and I swear it steers me into the worst possible routes. Maybe I'll even pull over for a snack break. Maybe I need a snack break… chocolate, stat!
- 4:00 PM - 5:00 PM (ish): Check into the Quality Inn. Ah, the promise of a clean bed and a lukewarm breakfast. This is the part where the real vacationing starts and the reality hits you. The room better damn well not stink of chlorine and air freshener. I'm looking at you, budget motels. I will inspect the sheets with a critical eye. I’m a critic.
- 5:00 PM - 6:00 PM (ish): Unpack, try to avoid touching anything questionable, and collapse on the bed. Maybe watch some mindless TV – probably something awful, but comforting. I need to decompress. Honestly, I might take a nap. Don’t judge.
- 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM (ish): Dinner. We'll probably end up at some chain restaurant. I'm not expecting Michelin-star quality here. But at least the portions will be generous. I'm hoping for a "comfort food" night. I’m thinking… ribs, or a giant loaded baked potato. Or both. I'm not here to diet.
- 7:00 PM Onward: Mildly existential contemplation of my life choices. Maybe a walk around the parking lot to stretch my legs and escape the fluorescent lights. Maybe another episode of whatever mindless TV show is playing (hello, Property Brothers!) and probably fall asleep before 10 p.m. Because, let's face it, I’m getting old.
Day 2: Yosemite! (And the Potential for Total Disaster)
- 6:00 AM (ish): Wake up (if I can. Jet lag, anyone?), groaning at the thought of getting out of bed. Coffee. Coffee. COFFEE. Gotta fuel up for the day. Hope the hotel coffee is at least barely drinkable.
- 6:30 AM -7:00 AM (ish): Attempt the "complimentary" breakfast. I'm prepared for disappointment. And questionable scrambled eggs.
- 7:00 AM - 8:30 AM (ish): The drive to Yosemite. This is supposed to be the highlight. I'm picturing breathtaking views! But the drive…oh, the drive. Winding roads, potential for motion sickness (big issue for me), and the sheer volume of other tourists… it's a recipe for sensory overload. I'm already bracing myself.
- 8:30 AM - 12:00 PM (ish): Yosemite Valley – the main event!
- Here's where things get REALLY messy…
- Option 1 (If I'm Feeling Adventurous and Not Too Hungover): Hike. Hike! Hike? Okay, maybe. I'm easily swayed by the promise of waterfalls. But I'm also a klutz. I'll probably trip on a root, get mud on my pants, and have a minor internal crisis about my fitness level. I'd be taking tons of pictures. Probably all terrible.
- Option 2 (If I'm Feeling Lazy and Resentful of All the Hiking): Drive around. Gawk at the views from the car. Pull over for a photo op. Complain about the crowds. Eat a mediocre sandwich. Wonder why I didn't just stay home and watch Netflix. The comfort of my own couch, the bliss of my own quiet.
- Option 3 (And This is the Most Likely Scenario): A combination of both. Hike a little. Whine a lot. Take pictures. Get slightly overwhelmed. Feel that feeling of awe mixed with a healthy dose of existential dread that nature always brings.
- The Big One: The Emotional Rollercoaster: I'm going to be brutally honest here. I expect to be both awestruck and annoyed. Yosemite is supposed to be magical, yes, but it's also going to be PACKED. Expect: a profound sense of wonder mixed with the mild rage of waiting in line for the bathroom.
- Here's where things get REALLY messy…
- 12:00 PM - 1:00 PM (ish): Lunch. Picnic or a bad cafe? The choice is mine! I'm betting on the latter - because I am always disappointed.
- 1:00 PM - 4:00 PM (ish): More Yosemite. More hiking (or driving). More existential angst. More photos. I'm going to try to find a quiet spot to just…be. But I'm doubtful.
- 4:00 PM - 5:30 PM (ish): The Long Drive of Despair back to Merced: Traffic. Boredom. Regret. More traffic. Counting down the minutes until I can take off my shoes. Again.
- 5:30 PM - 7:00 PM (ish): Dinner. Where? I don't care. Anywhere that's open and doesn't require a reservation. I'm really craving pizza. Or a burger. Or… oh, who am I kidding? Both.
- 7:00 PM Onward: Collapse into a chair. Flip through photos. Complain about my sore feet. Start planning my next vacation, because misery loves company.
Day 3: Winding Down (or Winding Up?)
- 6:00 AM (ish): Wake up. Repeat the coffee ritual. Pretend I'm not dreading the airport.
- 6:30 AM - 7:00 AM (ish): The obligatory, disappointing hotel breakfast.
- 7:00 AM - 9:00 AM (ish): Optional: Might try to visit a local attraction, like, I don't know, the Merced County Courthouse Museum (research later). Or just wander around, because hey, I'm on vacation. Maybe I'll treat myself and get some ice cream.
- 9:00 AM - 10:00 AM (ish): Pack. Clean the room (ish). Leave a ridiculously small tip, because let's be honest, the cleaning crew had a tough job.
- 10:00 AM - 11:00 AM (ish): Checkout. Say goodbye to the Quality Inn (good riddance!).
- 11:00 AM - 1:00 PM (ish): Drive to Sacramento airport. Pray for no traffic. Seriously.
- 1:00 PM (ish): Return the car. Hope the rental car company doesn't try to charge me for something I didn't do.
- Flight Time: Wait at the gate.
- Flight: On any given travel day, the flights are rarely on time, and one of the worst feelings when traveling alone is walking through the airport and feeling lost with the other people.
- Home: If on time, go home and be happy you had this vacation.
- Overall Assessment: This trip will probably be a chaotic mess. It will be exhausting. There will be moments of pure frustration. BUT, there will also, HOPEFULLY, be moments of beauty, wonder, and maybe, just maybe, a fleeting sense of peace. And hey, at the end of the day, I'll have survived. And that, my friends, is a vacation victory in itself.
…and that's about it. Wish me luck. I’m gonna need it. I'm going to need a lot of wine when this is all over.
Marshalltown's BEST Kept Secret: Comfort Inn South Review (WOW!)
Is this place REALLY a good basecamp for Yosemite? Like, REALLY?
Okay, so, HONESTLY? Yes. And no. Look, it's in Merced. That's, like, an hour-ish drive to the park entrance, depending on traffic. Traffic is a beast. Remember that time? Driving back after accidentally wandering on Lower Yosemite Falls trail for literal hours. Legs were killing, sunset's golden hour was melting away. I swear, I thought the air was even *thicker* with anticipation. It can be awesome, seeing the mountain and then rushing back to the hotel for the night. But it's also, let's call it, *adjacent* to the park. Not *in* it. So, if you need to be INSTANTLY at the valley floor, maybe not. But for the price, the amenities (that pool is a lifesaver after a hike, even if the tiles are a little…rustic), and, you know, being able to actually get a room without selling a kidney? Yeah, it's a solid choice. You'll be glad when those park lodge prices have you wincing and looking for a cheaper option. That's happened to me more than once.
What's the deal with the "Adventure" part? Does it involve…actual adventures?
Ha! I love this question. "Adventure." Marketing, right? I mean, it's not like they're holding daily bear encounters… (though that would be a story, wouldn't it?). But seriously, it's hinting at the *proximity* to the real adventure: Yosemite! The front desk *might* have some basic trail maps, and there are some brochures – don't base your itinerary on glossy brochures. Ask them for the best place to buy lunch while on the road, it's better than relying on the glossy brochures. Trust me, you'll find your own adventure once you get into the park. My adventure? Finding the perfect spot to eat my sandwich with a view of El Capitan. Took me a solid hour of wandering, but the sandwich tasted epic. That counts as adventure, right?
Okay, but the rooms? Are they…clean? And do they have, like, working AC?
Alright, let's be real. It's a budget-friendly hotel. Expectations need to be adjusted. Clean? Generally yes. There might be a stray crumb on the carpet that your toddler finds before you do (true story, happened last year!), and the shower pressure *might* be a little…enthusiastic. But, and this is a big BUT, they're usually clean enough for a good night's sleep after a day of hiking. AC? Yes! Thank God. Merced gets HOT. I'm talking, melting butter on the sidewalk hot. So, yes, the AC is a lifesaver. Unless, of course, your unit decides to have a *moment* in the middle of the night. That happened to me *once*. Opened the window, got eaten alive by mosquitoes. Moral of the story: check the AC BEFORE you settle in. And bring bug spray.
Is there a pool? And, more importantly, is it a decent pool?
Yes! There *is* a pool! And honestly, it's a lifesaver, especially in the summer. After a day of hiking, your muscles will scream for a cold dip. And the pool is a good size for that. Don't expect the Ritz, though. This isn't a fancy resort pool. It's a motel pool. Sometimes the water is a bit cloudy, sometimes there are a few leaves floating around, and sometimes… (I’m not proud of this) I even found a rogue water balloon that had totally disappeared. The tiles are a LITTLE rough. But the point is, it's there, it's refreshing, it's open till late and perfect. That one time I forgot my towel… but I'm not going there again. It's a great place to soak your tired feet and contemplate the majesty of Yosemite. Just BYO towel.
What about breakfast? Is it... edible? And actually available?
Edible? Yes. Exciting? Maybe not. It’s the standard continental breakfast situation. Think: cereal of questionable origin, bagels that have seen better days, some sad looking fruit that probably got shipped from a different planet, and possibly some instant oatmeal. The coffee's generally strong enough to wake you up, though. And the waffle maker… now, the waffle maker is a game changer. If you're lucky enough to snag a waffle before it gets jammed or the batter runs out (pro tip: go early), you've got yourself a decent foundation for the day. But honestly, I always stop at a local diner for a proper breakfast on the way to Yosemite. It's worth the extra few bucks. The last time I had breakfast at the hotel, I was so eager to check out of the hotel and reach the park that I forgot to eat. And I regretted it.
Are there any restaurants nearby? Besides the hotel's sad breakfast?
Absolutely! Merced has a pretty decent selection of restaurants. You'll find everything from fast food (because, you know, sometimes you just need a burger) to some surprisingly good local eateries. Just ask the front desk for recommendations - they usually know the good stuff. Don't expect Michelin star dining, but you won't starve. I had some great tacos from a local truck. They were so good. And a killer breakfast burrito. I wanted to have them again but I was too busy getting my adventure on.
Let's talk parking. Is it a nightmare?
Parking's... generally okay. Usually. There's a decent amount of parking around the hotel. It's not like a parking garage in the city. Though, there might be times when you're circling around. Especially during peak season. Just be mindful of other cars, and try not to take up two spots. The worst I've seen was the time a whole tour bus appeared, but I just gave up and parked at the nearest restaurant nearby. Not the end of the world. Just plan for a little extra time if you arrive late. It's far better than the parking chaos inside Yosemite itself, honestly.
What's the Wi-Fi like? Is it reliable? Because I REALLY need to post my Instagram photos.
Wi-Fi... Ah, the eternal struggle. It's generally available. Might be a little sketchy at times. Think of it as a test of your digital detox abilities. If you absolutely *must* upload those stunning photos of Half Dome, keep the reception in mind. If it slows down, or just straight up cuts out, don't freak out. You're in Yosemite! Put the phone down and enjoy the view! My phoneEscape to Greendale: Your Perfect Comfort Inn & Suites Getaway!
